Kali

We released Kali from her suffering this weekend. She battled recurrent uveitis for the better part of the last two years and in the last two weeks changes accelerated, she lost vision in one eye, and we were unable to keep her comfortable by any standard any longer. Tears flow as I write this. Kali was a fiery diva who would lose her mind at new events, but amidst routine and stability was tender, motherly, loving, and could be handled by our most novice participants.

We named her Kali after the Hindu goddess. I do not pretend to understand the richness and depths of Hindu traditions (and apologize for undoubtedly butchering them in my attempts to wrap my arms around it), but the complex notion that the goddess is considered to be of ultimate power, destruction and change, while also considered to be the divine mother of the universe stated to destroy evil in order to protect the innocent - all of that just seemed apt. She invoked fear in the round pen as she thundered around and it forced participants to look inward and make change. And when that change occurred she’d wheel in and stand before them, lower her head, and blow softly onto their heart center and would follow like a sleepy puppy as they traversed. The power of those moments live within each of us.

In her few short years with us, she also raised and properly weaned a yearling that came to us unexpectedly. The yearling (Isa) came in terrified and Kali immediately ran over to the fence line and put her head over the filly’s neck and said, “you are mine.” Isa has turned into a lovely and confident young lady over the years, no doubt thanks to the endless hours Kali spent eating by her side and filling her up with all the knowledge.

There is no way to end this post well as we are still grieving and closure is not yet at hand. But she gave more than she ever took and she will not be forgotten. Thank you Heart of Phoenix Horse Rescue for getting her a second chance and bringing her into our lives.